Scratch and Run
Monday, January 30, 2006
I can only take so much rejection before it's time to stop trying.
Subway, you obviously don't feel the same way that I did about you. Thanks for stringing me along for all these years. I thought it meant something. It was childish to tell me this way... with scratch off tickets. I keep thinking that the next one might be the one, but they all say the same thing.
Sorry, please try again.
I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but I've been seeing Panera Bread behind your back for months. We have been very happy together. Plus Panera Bread has pretenious coffee house people who whine about how hard it is to have to go shopping all day when their husbands are at work. It even has business men who will take up an entire 6-top table for hours during lunch time when there are people standing and waiting for seats. It something you will never understand.
But we will still see eachother when I have to stop at a gas station / Subway hybrid where they have Amish girls throwing away their religious vows for $5.50 an hour on the electric cash register. So there will be no hard feelings I got you a scratch off ticket Valentine's day card. I already did the maze on the back. It was easier to do if I started from the end.
Hot for teacher.
I thought I had found my million dollar idea with the scratch off Valentine's day cards but apparently this idea is as old as saying sliced bread is a new invention. No one has ever given me a scratch off Valentine's day card. I'm sure they are a big hit in the trailer parks.
posted by Ghengis @ 11:10 PM,
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Free Engine Inside
Monday, January 23, 2006
I've been looking for a new car. The Grand Am still runs, but she's getting tired and she still cries all of the time. After the next big breakdown she's getting kicked to the curb and I'm changing the locks. Why can't you ever think of my needs?
Of course, I've started my search online putting in parameters of what I'm looking for and hoping to find a few surprises. Some of the dealers are very effective at giving straight forward descriptions of the vehicle's features.
Vehicle includes: Power Steering, Power Brakes, Power Door Locks, Power Windows, Power Driver's Seat, AM/FM Stereo Radio, Compact Disc Player, Trip Odometer, Tachometer, Air Conditioning, Tilt Steering Wheel, and Cruise Control.This lets me know exactly what I'm getting into before I drive to the dealership for a test drive. It leaves a few questions to be asked, but it's basic and easy to read.
However, many of the car dealers post something like this:
Vehicle includes: Power Steering, Power windows, Powered battery, door handles, SEE-THRU WINDOWS, foot pedals, steering wheel, radio for music, screws, bolts (no nails sorry!), seat cushions, a trunk, HEATER FOR WINTER!!!@!, comes with paint ALREADY ON THE CAR! and *OIL CHANGES FOR LIFE* - CALL LARRY AND ASK ABOUT THIS BEAUT!These are all written by "my dad owned an auto dealership so I didn't have to go to college". However, the more-is-better philosophy must have been ingrained early in childhood.
*Owner must pay for oil changes
"Teacher, why did I get an F on this book essay? I copy and pasted the entire book and put it in Appendix A. Did you even read my report? I wrote something about my dogs at the end of Appendix T. How can 15024 pages deserve and F for all the work it took?"
Does anyone have/have personal experience with a Mazda6?
posted by Ghengis @ 10:59 PM,
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Let's hear another story about your hobbies
Thursday, January 19, 2006
Google takes their time approving videos that are submitted to them. I guess only the finest videos make it to the google collection. I suppose they want me to feel honored to have my
Try not to get sick.
That's enough about skiing for awhile.
posted by Ghengis @ 11:08 PM,
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Utah
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Looks painted.
It is hard to leave Utah without someone trying to turn you into a Mormon. I'm not sure what the draw is to the faith. They are certainly nice people, but I am afraid of people who chase me down the street trying to hand books to me. When someone tried to give me the book of Mormon I asked him if I joined his church if I would be allowed to chase people with books too. He smiled and said that it was probably the only thing I would be doing. I think it might sound like fun.
If you don't know, from what I have read, the Mormons believe that after Jesus left the Middle East, he landed back on earth as a baby in America. His spacecraft crashed into a farm house in the middle of Iowa where he was found by a farmer and his wife wrapped in an American flag. This Jesus grew up fast and found out that he had the power of flight and could see through the thickest steel. He used this power to teach the Indians how to trick the white people out of their money. Thus the first Casino was born in Salt Lake City.*
My doctor laughed at me when I said that I went skiing the week after they wanted to make sure my heart was working correctly.
Doctor, mountains are filled with iron and minerals to keep me healthy.
* Just kidding, Jesus. I don't want to go to hell.
It is hard to leave Utah without someone trying to turn you into a Mormon. I'm not sure what the draw is to the faith. They are certainly nice people, but I am afraid of people who chase me down the street trying to hand books to me. When someone tried to give me the book of Mormon I asked him if I joined his church if I would be allowed to chase people with books too. He smiled and said that it was probably the only thing I would be doing. I think it might sound like fun.
If you don't know, from what I have read, the Mormons believe that after Jesus left the Middle East, he landed back on earth as a baby in America. His spacecraft crashed into a farm house in the middle of Iowa where he was found by a farmer and his wife wrapped in an American flag. This Jesus grew up fast and found out that he had the power of flight and could see through the thickest steel. He used this power to teach the Indians how to trick the white people out of their money. Thus the first Casino was born in Salt Lake City.*
My doctor laughed at me when I said that I went skiing the week after they wanted to make sure my heart was working correctly.
Doctor, mountains are filled with iron and minerals to keep me healthy.
* Just kidding, Jesus. I don't want to go to hell.
posted by Ghengis @ 11:02 PM,
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